Strangers are alike

One night of blur is all it takes to rediscover yourself. The ones you're fond of but kept pushing away, the torn paper you had used for scribbling and then tucked away somewhere else,the feelings you thought you were done with,the fears you thought you didn't fear any more. One of my most favourite poets had once told me,"I know you never forgot the fear." As the first rays of the morning sun melts my insomniac dreams,I see his chest rising and dropping and I wonder what he had meant. The tricky thing about alcohol is that it makes you delusional. You tend to get a little unsure of yourself. At least that's what happens to me. I look around,tracing his touch along my fingers and then deep down. I don't know what it means. I don't know why I have that throbbing pain rising near my vertebra. All I know is that I'm supposed to go home,take a shower and forget all about it. All I know is that I won't. I've done this way too many times to doubt my stupidity now. I somehow want to run away.
                                                                He drags me closer and locks his lips between those of mine. Last night was a night of dreams and nightmares. I didn't sleep well. But at the same time,waking up to his embrace was comforting,to say the least. I know the other one will call sooner or lesser. I know he'll be happy for me. I know I'd keep wondering whether I'm in love with any or both of them.
                                                                                                                                 As the silent tears stream down my cheeks,I give in to the friend I had avoided for so long! My words. My words are all I'll ever have. Like I faintly remember telling him...the words that followed like open-ended arguments,the dreams I never weaved and never will...I walk the path all alone to see my happiness etherized like a dead beauty-cold,untouched,distant.